|
50 Cherry Hill Road, Princeton, NJ 08540 |
||||
|
http://www.centraljersey.com/articles/2009/07/21/lifestyle/doc4a6639168bd51661789380.txt SPOTLIGHT: There are no geographical limits for membership in any of the 100 FCA affiliates nationwide Tuesday, July 21, 2009 6:04 PM EDT By Pat Summers Special Writer
|
||||
|
Among the great majority of us flocking together in discomfort at
thoughts of death and dying, Laurie Powsner is the rara avis —she’s
downright positive about such things. (Or should that be “upright”
positive?)
Most of all, Ms. Powsner’s positive about the importance of advance planning. “It doesn’t have to be a bummer, it doesn’t have to be gloomy,” she says. “What I really like is when a family takes the time to do it right. You’ll get only one funeral. It can be meaningful, lovely, healing.” One of Ms. Powsner’s jobs is to help facilitate such a funeral, and economically, at that. Her role as executive director of the Funeral Consumers Alliance of Princeton (FCAP) caps her nearly 15-year volunteer affiliation with the organization. She’s also board president of the national Funeral Consumers Alliance.
“It’s really rewarding to give people information that they need. I can
do it in a way that is not uncomfortable for me, not uncomfortable for
people. I’m very direct.”
So true. |
|||
|
And Ms.
Powsner’s no other-worldly Pollyanna, either. She and her psychologist
husband Jonathan Krejci, director of Research and Training at Princeton
House, live in Princeton with their two children, 19-year old Ben and
13-year old Sarah, two cats and two dogs.
As a social worker, Ms. Powsner has a range of paid jobs, and her volunteer activities recently involved co- chairing a weeklong Unitarian-Universalist family conference off the coast of New Hampshire. Her professional experience includes social work with homeless people at Boston’s Travelers Aid Society, then seven years at University Medical Center at Princeton hospice. Although she began this job “young and green,” she “grew to absolutely love it,” saying it shaped her comfort with death and dying. “Personally and professionally, I’ve found if you can get to a place where it just is what it is, and you know it’s gonna happen and you’re not fighting it so much, you can make it a better experience. People who kick and scream all the way to death’s door don’t have the opportunity to say goodbye, to do that last thing they wanted to do. “If as a culture we could accept dying as a part of life, we could all do it much more gracefully.” Ms. Powsner now works per diem at the medical center in both hospice and acute rehab — where she counsels and helps people get home. Since 1996, she has been in private practice in Princeton as an independent consultant and therapist. In coming across as upbeat and lively in discussing death and its trappings, she’s the antithesis of most funeral directors. Of their usual somber manner, she thinks they “can’t be completely chipper because they worry about offending someone.” But advance planning for funerals doesn’t have to be a gloomy thing; in fact, humor helps, she says. “Sometimes I’ll say, ‘Are you in a hurry?’ because if someone’s dying, it’s a more emotional conversation. But if someone’s just planning ahead, it doesn’t need to be really serious.” In her role with FCAP, Ms. Powsner answers questions from anyone, member or not. One person recalls, “Even though I phoned unannounced and the help I needed was in a different county, I was struck by her willingness to help and the range and depth of her knowledge.” In fact, there are no geographical limits for membership in any of the 100 affiliates nationwide, including New Jersey’s seven. It depends on what one is looking for; some societies offer funeral home discounts, for example. Overall, the organization’s focus is to keep vulnerable people shopping for funerals from being taken advantage of, she says, speaking from her local and national vantage points. “It’s a social justice issue that just happens to be about end-of- life issues.” Not only are they vulnerable, but “people go into advance planning really ignorant,” Ms. Powsner believes. Most buy a refrigerator or car with a lot more knowledge than they have when “buying a funeral.” “People will be happier on so many levels if they just plan ahead,” she asserts. Children won’t have to agonize over asking parents’ preferences, and survivors will know when someone simply doesn’t care what happens after death. Another reason to pre-plan: Avoiding family warfare afterward. Ms. Powsner’s
non-funereal outlook extends to the talks she gives and FCAP publications.
The membership pamphlet, for example, includes a cartoon, a slogan (“Plan
ahead and rest in peace”) and matter-of-fact language throughout.
Citing her “wealth of knowledge about end-of-life issues and passion for spreading this knowledge,” Mea Kaemmerlen, FCAP’s board president, says the organization is “extremely lucky to have Laurie.” Funeral Consumers Alliance of Princeton, Inc., 50 Cherry Hill Road, Princeton 08540. Phone 609-924-3320, email fcap@uuprinceton.org or go to www.princetonol.com/ groups/fcap. Pat Summers is a freelance writer on lifestyles and arts. She blogs at AnimalBeat.blogspot.com. Free talks available The Speakers Bureau of the Funeral Consumers Alliance of Princeton (FCAP) offers a free presentation for retirement communities, religious, professional and social organizations and other groups. The talk, which can be customized, covers the choosing of a funeral home, costs, burial versus cremation, green burials, organ donation, planning a home funeral service, and more. The principal speaker is Laurie Powsner, MSW, executive director of FCAP. To book a presentation, contact Mea Kaemmerlen at 609-799-1419 or meakaem@aol.com.
|
||||
|
|
||||
|
This page last edited: May 24, 2010 |
||||
|
Back to top of page Return to home page
|
||||
